Should Your Parents Move in with You?

If you’re debating about having elderly parents move in with you, don’t feel alone. One in every four family caregivers lives with an elderly or disabled loved one they care for.  This can be a positive experience. A healthy parent can help around the house, possibly contribute financially, and get to know their grandchildren in a much more personal and up-close way that would never be possible with only occasional visits.

Of course, having a parent move in with you can also have its drawbacks. Strained relationships can worsen, finances can get tighter, and privacy may be sacrificed. This can create stress and tension for the entire family.

We can’t answer the question, “Should my parent move in with me?” But, we can provide you with some excellent questions you can ask yourself to help you decide.

Sit quietly and answer some thought-provoking questions concerning these five areas:

1. Relationships
2. Your home
3. Personal care
4. Money
5. Time

Are pencil and paper ready? Let’s begin.

Relationships

• How do my significant other and children feel about moving my parent in? How will it change our lives together?
• How is my relationship with my parent? Is it healthy, or is it problematic?
• What are my needs for privacy and alone time? What are my parent’s needs?
• What things will be easy for us to negotiate in living together, and what things will be hard?
• How will my siblings feel? How much help will they be able to giparentsin caring for our parent?

Your Home

• Where will my parent sleep? Will someone have to give up their bedrto oom, or will we convert another room? Or perhaps build an addition?
• What assistive devices will I need to buy and install – grab bars, raised toilet seats, ramps, etc.?
• Does my parent smoke or drink – and will that be a problem for us?
• Does my parent have a pet that will be living with us too? Can we care for it?

Personal Care

• How comfortable am I helping my parent with activities of daily living, like bathing, dressing, assisting with toileting, or changing an adult brief?
• What are the limits of my ability to care for my parent at home?
• Do I know what to expect over time as my parent’s condition changes?
• How is my health? Will I be able to take care of myself as well as my parent?
• Am I willing to accept respite care to get a break?

Money

• Will there be additional expenses to provide care?
• How will those expenses be paid for? Will I pay for them or will my parent?
• What will the financial arrangement be? Should I charge rent or ask for help with groceries?
• How will my siblings feel about the financial arrangement? Will they be able to help?
• Will my work situation have to change? If so, how will I cover the bills?

Time

• Will my parent need care during the day? If so, how will it be provided?
• How will I manage my job, childcare responsibilities, marriage, and taking care of my parent?
• When will I have time for myself?

Regardless of what you decide, AmeriCare Plus is here for you. We’ll provide your parents personal care, compassion, and security in the comfort of your home or theirs.

We’ve been serving Virginia’s senior population for over 26 years from our 10 locations; our mission is to help seniors age safely and with dignity where they most want to be: home.

Contact us to schedule your FREE in-home consultation. We can confirm the level of care your loved one needs and provide you with competitive pricing. We’re here to help.